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Vacation Reruns: Instant libertarian, just add capitalism and bureaucracy

So simple kids get it

Couple of weekends ago, our neighborhood had a garage sale. We set out to rid our home of various useless crap. Being neighborhood wide, we had hundreds of people come through. Junior gets the brilliant idea that, since these shoppers are in the hood for a long time, some of them must be thirsty and they’ll buy lemonade. She makes up a pitcher and sells out quick at a $1 a pop. On her second pitcher, I introduce some reality:

Me: So, for every lemonade you sell, you know I get fifty cents, right?

Junior: What?

Me: Well, you’re using my water, my lemonade, my cups, my sugar, my table, my chair and you’re on my driveway.

Junior: But I’m doing the work!

Me: With my stuff.

Wife: Oh stop it.

Me: I’m just trying to teach her something.

Junior: Oh.

Me: And you’ve got to pay taxes. I’d figure if you’re selling it for an even dollar 8 cents or so should cover sales tax. Then F&E taxes. And income taxes. Plus you probably need a permit and an inspection to make sure there are no cooties in your lemonade. And you’ll probably have to buy some sort of approved device for maintaining the lemonade at a safe temperature.

Junior: It’s called ICE.

Me: Yeah, but it melts.

Junior: That’s stupid. I’m keeping the money.

Me: Good girl! But you’re still paying me.

Junior: *evil stare*

6 Responses to “Vacation Reruns: Instant libertarian, just add capitalism and bureaucracy”

  1. M Gallo Says:

    My buddy did the same thing with his kid except with muffins from Costco. Amazingly, a 6 year old was able to use past years sales for projections, save up allowance money, and get to keep the profits rather than splitting them with Dad if Dad took on the capitalization risks.

    This market shit really is simple.

  2. guy Says:

    Me: I’m just trying to teach her something.

    Junior: Oh.

    BWAHAHAHAHA!

  3. snoopycomputer Says:

    +500 dad points

  4. treefroggy Says:

    Teach ’em the truth young and keep reinforcing it .

  5. Patrick Says:

    My kid (same age as yours) wants to play this game during our vacation at the family place – in a beach town, during “the rush”. We are literally across the sand, on the road and directly between 10,000 beach goers and the only commercial area 4 blocks north that holds drinks.

    Given the dynamics of that scene, I expect our kid will also learn lessons in rent-seeking regulation and SWAT raids, all supported by the local merchants association.

    Ain’t Amerika great?

  6. mikee Says:

    Did your daughter immediately go to a neighbor and ask if they were amenable to a lower-cost location of a lemonade stand? Did you even suggest the possibility of avoiding the high-tax, high-regulation zone around your house?

    If you’re teaching the kid a lesson, teach her the whole lesson! As in, how to avoid crap like that.