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Not a Real American Hero after all

The new GI JOE stands for Globally Integrated Joint Operating Entity. And works for the UN. Weirdest thing to happen to GI Joe since he went from 12 inches to three.

38 Responses to “Not a Real American Hero after all”

  1. Magus Says:

    I wouldn’t say it’s weird, I’d say it’s fucked up as a football bat.

    I don’t care if it’s a good movie or not, none of my money is going to support it in any way. The creators of this movie have shit on the people of these United States and I’ll not give them the paper to wipe their ass with.

  2. Boyd Says:

    Weirdest thing to happen to GI Joe since he went from 12 inches to three.

    Yeah, and the dolls got a lot smaller, too.

  3. Chas Says:

    GI Joe’s gone commie, but so has the White House. It’s the times we live in.

  4. Guav Says:

    I’ve been hearing that for a while now, but I can’t find any official reference to that fact other than people saying that’s what it stands for now. Could be true—in which case as a GI Joe purist I’ll be bummed—but it could be a totally invented interwebs rumor. Guess I’ll find out tomorrow 🙂

  5. Sebastian-PGP Says:

    Guys. Really.

    It’s fiction. Get a grip.

  6. Otter Says:

    “Fiction. Get a grip.”???

    I don’t the point is the “fiction” part of it, the point is the ongoing trend to devalue and belittle traditional American icons and themes. It’s a bigger issue than just a movie.

    How can you miss that? Really?

  7. Guav Says:

    To me it’s not a bigger issue … I just think it’d be fucking dumb to change it, because … well, that’s not what GI Joe is. It’s like saying that all of a sudden Yoda is not a Jedi. Or that Transformers aren’t robots.

    If you don’t want to make a movie about “Real American Heroes” then just invent a new franchise about a multinational force.

  8. princewally Says:

    “It’s fiction. Get a grip.”

    It’s my childhood they’re fucking with. I don’t need a grip.

  9. _Jon Says:

    They are changing the elements a brand.
    Guav’s points are very relevant and valid.

    I don’t go to a Ford dealership and expect to find a Kia.
    Nor do I buy a Coke and expect to get a Pepsi.

    They are marketing a product “G.I. Joe – Real American Heroes”, but they aren’t providing “G.I. Joe” that the brand is based off of.

    It is false advertising and deceptive.

    Also, I never had a G.I. Joe, so I have no emotional attachment.

  10. Cam Says:

    When I took my kids to go see G-Force the other day I saw a preview for G.I. Joe. Unlike previous versions, this one actually had a character say (off camera), “A real American hero”.

    My guess is that the studio has heard the rumblings of the fanboys and is trying to throw them a bone.

  11. Guav Says:

    … OR all this talk of it standing for “Globally Integrated Joint Operating Entity” was never actually true in the first place.

    I think I first heard about it in an email forward months ago, and we all know how accurate those usually are. I hope it’s wrong.

  12. Ron W Says:

    The CFR politicians have long since sold us out to UN globalism. Prime example: our military is no longer sent forth under U.S. Constitutional authority by Congressionally declared wars or by Letters of Marqui to pursue and defeat enemies not under any other national authority. No, the globalist traitors use our military to enforce UN resolutions or do peace-keeping, or guard other borders (like Korea for 50+ years) while our own borders undergo unrepelled invasion…allowed so by presidents like Bush and Obama. Treason is the reason!

    So the toy soldiers are teachng aids to train our kids to be good little slaves on the New World Order plantation.

  13. Tam Says:

    Shiny side in, Ron.

  14. Matt Groom Says:

    Not real.
    Not an American.
    Not a hero.

    I’m not going to see this crap. They already killed Indiana Jones, made Star Wars into cartoonish stupidity with a Marxist slant, and it’s like that whole Superman returns bullshit:

    “Does he still stand for Truth Justice… all that stuff?”

    What?! Are you fuckin’ with me?! “Look! It’s a bird! It’s a plane! No… wait. Nevermind.”

    I bought a box full of new and nearly new DVDs a year ago at a yard sale and Superman Returns was in it and I still haven’t watched it.

  15. Sebastian-PGP Says:

    So then don’t go see it. I collected GI Joe comics religiously in the early 80s too…but it’s not the 80s anymore.

    How can you miss that?

    Times have changed and the themes in movies have changed. Expecting Indiana Jones and Duke and Scarlet and Lady Jaye to look and sound the same 25 years later is silly.

  16. Ron W Says:


    Any factual refutation?

  17. Bobby Says:

    Get a grip…


    ‘nother movie to save money by.

  18. Tam Says:

    As soon as my masters at Skull & Bones get it to me, I’ll let you know.

  19. Dan Says:

    This movie looks awful. Probably will make tons of money though. But I read somewhere the pro-America line will be taken out to appease foreign audiences.

    Bring back Sgt. Slaughter.

  20. Magus Says:

    I’ve been hearing that for a while now, but I can’t find any official reference to that fact other than people saying that’s what it stands for now.

    Dunno if IMDB is “official”, but:

    The story is set at Brussels-based GIJOE, an acronym for the Global Integrated Joint Operating Entity, and revolves around an international co-ed force of operatives who use high-tech equipment to battle Cobra, an evil org headed by a Scottish arms dealer. –Real Movie News 11/20/07


  21. Rabbit Says:

    Wha’hae gain’ Scots, laddie?


  22. vanBoogle Says:

    from Guav:
    “If you don’t want to make a movie about “Real American Heroes” then just invent a new franchise about a multinational force.”

    I agree. Maybe they can make a new Megaforce movie. They had flying motorcycles with frickin’ rocket launchers!

  23. Gunner Says:

    When I was younger I not only had the foot tall GI Joe with full kit, but his 18 inch jeep. Back in my youth he was more of a WW2/Korea war era outfitted soldier. Although I did have a tiger stripe outfit I like the standard green colored outfit the best.

  24. Linoge Says:

    Times have changed and the themes in movies have changed.

    Themes may have. But there is no excuse for changing the actual story.

  25. Ron W Says:


    Thanks, I’ll take that as a no.

    Since you mention it, check out the short clip:

  26. Thirdpower Says:

    There’s a Wayans brother in it. That neutralizes any coolness the film might have had.

  27. Dave thA Says:

    They are just trying to take away the last thing that you can trust – your own memory.

    G.I. Joe never existed as a 12″ US hero.
    He always was 3″ and a commie.
    There was no Kung-Fu Grip.
    You are mistaken.

    We can’t trust in a supply of ammo, the banks, gov’t, judicial system, big business, imported goods, food, global warming, auto companies, insurance, healthcare, pensions, 401ks, etc.

  28. straightarrow Says:

    Anything that reduces the image of G.I. Joe to anything less than an American Hero is to be reviled.

    Ask Ted Rubin. Look him up, under Medal of Honor awardees. See how he decided to become a G.I. Joe, and he was Hungarian.

  29. Tam Says:

    Ron W,

    What are the odds that two ambitious men who go to the same school might belong to the same elitist club while attending?

    I know, I know, it’s a stretch…

    A lot of this is chicken/egg stuff: Is the local country club a secret cabal that rules your city, or is it the place where the people that run your city all hang out?

  30. nk Says:

    Action figure my …. Boys should not be playing with any kind of dolls.

  31. Ron W Says:


    I dunno, you mentioned it. IF it’s just a fraternity or “elitist club”…why not just say that?? But then, “it’s a stretch” from what I originally wrote back up in #12…for which the dismissive reply is much like the answers of the two frat brothers to the late, Tim Russert.

  32. Rich Paul Says:

    I saw the movie last night and it is quite good. Yes it is a multi-national force but in the end they are battling evil and putting the wrong things right. Isn’t that what is most important? Granted I wouldn’t want the french guy as my back-up but still. Actually there were no french soldiers in GI Joe. So I think we’re good to go. Besides the whole operation was being run by an American general. So at least C&C is in American hands.

  33. Ron W Says:

    “Anything that reduces the image of G.I. Joe to anything less than an American Hero is to be reviled.”

    But straightarrow, like former Prez, Bill Clinton said, “globalism is the central reality of our time”

  34. Tam Says:

    Ron W,

    Going on about the CFR is prima facie crazy talk.

    Acting surprised to find influential academics, political leaders, and leading businessmen in a club for influential academics, political leaders, and leading businessmen is as crazy as opening a box of Uncle Ben’s and saying “Holy shit, there’s rice in here!

    Hey, guess what you’ll find at a CEO’s convention?

  35. Ron W Says:

    “Going on about the CFR is prima facie crazy talk.”

    Tam, that reminds me of the vapidity of the frat brothers being asked about S&B.

    I go on what is admitted and what I the ongoing policies that subvert our Constitution in favor of globalism regardless of what party is supposedly in power.

    “Once the ruling members of the CFR shadow government have decided that the U.S. Government should adopt a particular policy, the very substantial research facilities of (the) CFR are put to work to develop arguments, intellectual and emotional, to support the new policy, and to confound and discredit, intellectually and politically, any opposition.”
    – Admiral Chester Ward, former CFR member and Judge Advocate General of the U.S. Navy

  36. Ron W Says:

    More recently, Henry Kissinger, longtime CFR member, McCain campaign advisor and tutor to Gov. Sarah Palin, turned cheerleader for President-elect Barack Obama when he said,

    “The president-elect is coming into office at a moment when there is upheaval in many parts of the world simultaneously. You have India, Pakistan; you have the jihadist movement. So he can’t really say there is one problem, that it’s the most important one. But he can give new impetus to American foreign policy partly because the reception of him is so extraordinary around the world. His task will be to develop an overall strategy for America in this period when, really, A NEW WORLD ORDER CAN BE CREATED IT’s A GREAT OPPORUNITY, it isn’t just a crisis.”

  37. The Armed Partisan Says:

    I wonder if COBRA is the good guys in this re-imagining?

  38. Linoge Says:

    Well, just got back from it… GI-JOE is now some multi-national force, though at least the two leads are from the US Military. The good guys still win, the bad guys get pwned, and there is an opening for a sequel.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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