Archive for June, 2004

June 15, 2004

Email bloatware

Today, Yahoo tells me that it’s upping my email storage amount from 4MB to 100MB. Cool, say I. However, this storage space (which I never use, as I keep my email folders empty for the most part) has caused some reliability issues. Check mail, and I get a Cannot find server error about half the time.

The War on Lawful Commerce

A Wisconsin man has been convicted of two crimes: 1) possession of a machine gun and 2) engaging in lawful commerce:

The conviction of a Crivitz man dealing in firearms without a license sends a message to gun sellers that attempt to skirt licensing laws, federal officials said.

Failing to do required buyers? background checks also will not be tolerated, officials said.

Steven Biskupic, U.S. attorney for the Eastern District of Wisconsin, said a jury Wednesday convicted Steven W. Van Bellinger, 57, on charges of dealing in firearms without a license and possession of a machine gun.

The jury verdict came after a three-day trial before U.S. District Judge William Griesbach.

Biskupic said Van Bellinger faces up to 15 years in prison and fines up to $500,000 when he is sentenced. No sentencing date has been set.

The federal government also will ask the court to order Van Bellinger to forfeit about 60 firearms taken from his home when a search warrant was executed, Biskupic said. He said the charges stem from Van Bellinger?s sale of about 200 firearms, without a required federal firearms license, at gun shows in Wisconsin between 1992 and May 2003.

The machine-gun charge stemmed from guns seized from Van Bellinger, officials said.

The article mentions the machine gun possession only in passing to it’s larger point about the evil unlicensed dealers. However, if I had to guess, I’d say the bulk of the conviction is based on the machine gun. After all, a private citizen is not prevented by law from selling firearms that private individual owns.

The article and the BATFE agent in charge perpetuate the myth that terrorists buy guns at gun shows:

While a majority of the dealers at shows may be licensed dealers who follow rules and conduct required background checks, unlicensed dealers will attract buyers who know they will not pass a background check, Jones said.

?People know if they are not going to pass the background check, they can buy it there,? he said.

?If a person is illegally in the U.S. and they have intentions of doing harm, they are not going to Scheels sporting goods to buy guns. They are going to go to an unlicensed dealer, and they are going to pay cash and not show them ID if they don?t have to.?

And that, he said, can put the guns in the hands of criminals and terrorists.

?It isn?t like selling tennis shoes or anything. These are used in crimes,? Jones said.

First, to be smarmy, I’d say tennis shoes are used in crimes more often than guns (in fact this morning, I used my tennis shoes to speed to work). Second, a private individual may in fact engage in the lawful commerce of selling privately owned guns legally. Third, criminals tend to steal guns and I don’t know of a case where a terrorist has used a gun purchased at a gun show.

More:

But he said many sellers at gun shows who claim they are selling private collections cross the line.

?When a person goes from selling a small private collection to acquiring and selling dozens and dozens of guns for years, now you are in the business,? he said.

Yes, that may well be the case but unless it’s codified in law somewhere, I don’t see how a conviction could pass muster under federal law. I’m guessing the conviction rests mostly on the fact the man had a machine gun.

The man sold roughly 200 guns in an 11 year period. That’s about 18 guns per year. Or 1.5 per month. I don’t think that’s a business in the sense that the man was providing for his livelihood. If you know a lot of gun collectors like I do, many of these collectors go through guns quickly. Buy one, shoot it a few times, trade it away or sell it, and get another one. This man was obviously not moving significant volumes of guns.

Quote of the day

Tis a beaut:

It took less time to take Iraq than it took Janet Reno to take the Branch Davidian compound.

Kinda funny

Judge orders protesters to get real jobs. No word on a haircut.

Via Ravenwood.

Super secret legislation

Matt reports that congress is trying to sneak parts of PATRIOT Act 2 through the back door while, as is usual, no one is watching.

Justifiable Shooting

Even though I am a pro-gun absolutist, just as I don’t think cops should shoot people in the back when they are fleeing; I also don’t think homeowners should shoot intruders who are fleeing.

June 14, 2004

Road-Trip Blues

There are many fundamental truths in this world. At least two can be verified simply by hitting the Great American Road:

1. They always screw you at the drive-thru

2. Not enough people think “Slower Traffic Keep Right” means them

But it’s not like I’m bitter or anything.

One nation, under technicalities

Keeping with its long history of absolutely avoiding the fundamental issues at hand and relying on nitpicky crap no one gives a shit about to make the ultimate decision regarding the fate of things, the Supreme Court ruled that Michael Newdow could not sue to ban the pledge from his daughter’s school and others because he did not have legal authority to speak for her.

Update: XRLQ has more and it’s in far less condescending, smarmy tone than my, uhm, insightful and spot on analysis.

Numerous individuals utilize vocabulary

Seriously, this comes from someone who used the word bureaucratese, which coincidentally my spell checker didn’t like. And frequently uses the word apropos.

Tennessee Sounds Good To Me

Some reasons that I live here:

The typical Tennessean pays about 20% less in state taxes than workers in other states, according to a new study by the U.S. Bureau of Census.

And a separate study by the Tax Foundation recently found Tennessee’s state and local tax burdens are the fourth lowest among the 50 states this year. According to the foundation’s Web site, the organization is an independent nonprofit that analyzes data from all levels of government; explores the effect of tax policy on businesses and individuals alike; and channels the information to the public.

The U.S. Bureau of Census found that the typical Tennessee taxpayer paid $1,508 in state taxes during 2003, or $375.24 less than the U.S. average. Only Texas, South Dakota, Alabama and Colorado had lower per-capita state tax burdens.

Tennessee trailed only Alaska, New Hampshire and Delaware in the Tax Foundation rankings of lowest state and local tax states.

But the downside:

However, the state does have the highest sales tax in the nation — ranging as high as 9.25% when local rates are added to the state levy, the foundation says.

But they have free healthcare

No, they don’t. It’s far from free. When I was there, sales tax was 15% set aside for their system. That’s not free. The Canadian socialized healthcare system has some issues:

But more and more Canadians are awakening — not from a dream — but from a nightmare. The results are coming in. After years of government-controlled health care, the ordinary Canadian patient is noticing his health care system is ailing badly. Plus it’s bleeding money — his hard-earned tax dollars.

Comparing Canada with other industrialized countries in the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) that provide universal access to health care, a study released by The Fraser Institute in May revealed that Canada spends more on its system than other nations while ranking among the lowest in several key indicators, such as access to physicians, quality of medical equipment, and key health outcomes.

The study identifies one of the major reasons for this discrepancy. Unlike other countries in the study that outperformed Canada — such as Sweden, Japan, Australia, and France — Canada outlaws virtually all private health care. If the government says it provides a medical service, it’s illegal for a Canadian citizen to pay for and get the service privately. In practice, this means a patient must linger in line for hospital treatment — an average of 17.7 weeks in 2003, according to an annual survey on hospital waiting list published by the Fraser Institute.

There’s more on how not good their system is.

Update: More here.

Weekly check on the bias

Jeff has the latest.

Ouch

Howard Nemerov writes:

“The Senators and Representatives shall … in all Cases, except Treason, Felony and Breach of the Peace, be privileged from Arrest during their Attendance at the Session of their respective Houses, and in going to and returning from the same; and for any Speech or Debate in either House, they shall not be questioned in any other Place.” – US Constitution, Article 1, Section 6, Clause 1.

It’s Okay to Lie In Congress

The preceding excerpt from the Constitution is our origin of what is called legislative immunity. It means that if Dianne Feinstein prefers to lie while carrying out her job as Senator, we cannot hold her liable. Furthermore, if her dishonest comments are quoted by the New York Times, it is given an aura of authority. If other newspapers use quotes from the NYT, often called the paper of record, in their own articles, pretty soon it becomes gospel truth, because you can read it just about anywhere.

June 13, 2004

Lifetime

With the pregnancy, the Mrs. is spending more time watching television. Unfortunately, she’s spending a lot of time watching Lifetime and the movies that are made by Lifetime.

The basic premise of these made for Lifetime movies is pretty simple. Get some former TV starlet (like Markie Post), cast her as some ultra-successful type. Add a bad man and an extraordinarily unrealistic plot (that either involves abuse or murder), and you have a a Lifetime movie. All the plots boil down to this: Women = Good; Men = Bad. Lifetime slogan is Television for Women. Here are my choices for what it’s slogan should be:

Lifetime: Television that sucks!

Lifetime: Television for people with unrealistic world views.

Lifetime: Television so bad, it’s good.

Lifetime: Television for idiots.

Lifetime: What do you do?

Lifetime: We’re not even trying.

Lifetime: Men are evil, except the gay ones.

Lifetime: No, we’re serious.

Lifetime: We have unrealistic solutions to your unrealistic problem.

Lifetime: Scaring the shit out of affluent, white women for 20 years.

Update: One more:

Lifetime: Well, it’s not Oprah.

Once more, with feeling

Oh, those weapons of mass destruction. And this story isn’t huge?

June 12, 2004

Unleashing my inner redneck

I periodically need reminding of my hillbilly roots, I typically do this by enjoying some fine southern cuisine. Today’s culinary selection is a true southern staple, pinto beans. Stuff needed:

Large pot
Water
Dried pinto beans
Onion chopped
2 – 3 Bay leaves
Either a Ham hock, soup bone, or some salt pork fatback

The quick method: Put beans in pot, boil on high heat for 10 minutes, strain. Add enough water to clear the beans by about an inch or two. Add remainder of ingredients and bring to a boil. Lower heat to medium and let gently boil for a few hours or until beans are tender.

Over night method: Bypass the boiling for 10 minutes and soak the beans in a large pot over night. The next morning, strain. Add enough water to clear the beans by about an inch or two. Add remainder of ingredients and bring to a boil. Lower heat to medium and let gently boil for a few hours or until beans are tender.

With pinto beans, you must have corn bread. Seriously, it’s a law or something.

June 11, 2004

Oh yeah, well I’m more Reaganer than you!

Apologies for twice in a row drawing attention to the politicization of Ronald Reagan. However, the NRA is saying:

Exploiting tragedy for political gain is nothing new for the media and the Brady Campaign, but this morning’s appearance on NBC’s Today Show reached a new low. Katie Couric and Sarah Brady used the tragic occasion of President Reagan’s passing to shamelessly forward the gun-ban agenda with deliberate misinformation. Led by carefully crafted questions from Couric, Sarah Brady claimed that President Reagan wasn’t actually an NRA member, and that he “worked hard” for passage of the so-called “assault weapons” ban.

In fact, President Reagan, the owner of an AR-15, was a strong and consistent supporter of the Second Amendment and the NRA. He was a long time member who actively courted the NRA’s endorsement in both of his presidential campaigns, and was the first presidential candidate in history to receive that endorsement. He appeared on the cover of NRA magazines four times. In 1983 he was offered, and accepted, an NRA Honorary Life Membership, the highest honor bestowed by the NRA.

He was the first, and to date, only, sitting president to speak at our Annual Meetings, saying, in part, “The NRA believes America’s laws were made to be obeyed and that our constitutional liberties are just as important today as 200 years ago. And by the way, the Constitution does not say Government shall decree the right to keep and bear arms. The Constitution says ‘the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.’” In 1986, President Reagan signed the landmark Firearms Owners Protection Act (FOPA), and he never blamed law-abiding gun owners for the actions of criminals.

And the Coalition to Stop Gun buying Violence says:

John Hinckley’s deed left Brady paralyzed — and determined to end America’s “no questions asked” firearm policies. Brady and his wife Sarah got behind a proposal that would require criminal background checks for firearm sales through licensed dealers. It later became the Brady Bill.

President Reagan played an instrumental role in passing this landmark legislation. In late March of 1991, ten years after the shooting, Reagan joined his former press secretary at George Washington University Hospital. There, at the very hospital at which both men were treated for their near-fatal wounds, Reagan said ” You do know that I’m a member of the NRA, and my position on the right to bear arms is well known…But I want you to know something else, and I am going to say it in clear, unmistakable language: I support the Brady bill, and I urge the Congress to enact it without further delay.”

President Clinton signed the Brady Bill into law in 1993.

Later, in 1994, Reagan directly lobbied Members of Congress to pass the federal Assault Weapons Ban. The ban passed the U.S. House of Representatives 216-214, a margin of just two votes. One of those votes was cast by former Rep. Dick Swett (D-NH), who credited Reagan’s direct involvement for his “aye” vote. Swett told the Boston Globe, “he made up his mind after being lobbied by the idol of GOP conservatives, President Ronald Reagan.”

Reagan also won over the second vote that made the Assault Weapons Ban law. According to Wisconsin’s Capital Times, former Rep. Scott Klug (R-WI) voted for the assault weapons ban only after a “last-minute plea” from Reagan.

The Myth of Reagan and AIDS

Kevin linked to this piece by Bruce Garrett on Reagan and AIDS (which contains almost no links to back up assertions). SayUncle takes issue with it. I realize fully that the right is deifying Reagan but the left’s vilification is horrendous.

These have nothing to do with Bruce’s assertion but I’ll address them in brief. One claim is that Reagan didn’t fund aids, or didn’t fund it enough, or basically that he was pressured to fund it, or he didn’t do it quickly enough. Not true. Under Reagan’s presidency, almost $6B was spent on AIDS and it started as early as 1981. The other claim is that Reagan didn’t mention it in public until 1987. He signed the funding into law in 1981 so I’d say that’s acknowledging it. And he mentioned (See below) in 1985 and he specifically mentioned funding for it in 1986.

On to Bruce who makes this most asinine assertion:

Does the name Ryan White ring any bells out there? White was a kid who got AIDS by way of the clotting factor he needed to control his hemophilia. From the Ryan White Story Website:

He was determined to continue at his school and live life normally. But in 1985, not many people knew the truth about AIDS. Not very much was known about AIDS. Ryan faced a lot of discrimination, mostly based on the unknown. His school tried to keep him from attending and the town in which he lived was not very supportive, to say the least.

After legal battles, Ryan and his mother settled with the school to have separate restrooms and disposable silverware from the cafeteria. But that didn’t stop much. Students vandalized his locker with the word “FAG” and restaurants threw his dishes away after he left. A bullet was even fired into his home.

That’s putting what happened to this innocent kid mildly. And after he passed away, his gravesite was vandalized repeatedly.

So here comes Reagan, with this opportunity to do what the goddamn leader of the free world is supposed to do, speak up for the innocent, appeal to our better nature, quell the passions of the mob …and the pusillanimous Bastard says he sympathizes with the mob instead!

“I can understand both sides of it.”

Both sides? I’m sorry…Both Sides??? Like…the side that would fire a gun into a boy’s home, because the kid had AIDS? That side?

Passionate stirring scene, eh? Too bad it’s devoid of context. What really happened was at a news conference, someone asked:

Mr. President, returning to something that Mike [Mike Putzel, Associated Press] said, if you had younger children, would you send them to a school with a child who had AIDS?

Reagan said:

I’m glad I’m not faced with that problem today. And I can well understand the plight of the parents and how they feel about it. I also have compassion, as I think we all do, for the child that has this and doesn’t know and can’t have it explained to him why somehow he is now an outcast and can no longer associate with his playmates and schoolmates. On the other hand, I can understand the problem with the parents. It is true that some medical sources had said that this cannot be communicated in any way other than the ones we already know and which would not involve a child being in the school. And yet medicine has not come forth unequivocally and said, “This we know for a fact, that it is safe.” And until they do, I think we just have to do the best we can with this problem. I can understand both sides of it.

Don’t see Reagan taking the side of the people shooting. I see Reagan admitting a lot wasn’t known at the time about AIDS and he understood the fears of parents. He was also understanding of someone being stricken with this disease and facing hideous acts as a result.

Update: And how do I know that Reagan didn’t ignore AIDS? Because Fred Phelps (that raving, homophobic lunatic) thinks he’s in Hell.

For laughs

I like to visit the Ready.gov site periodically. The site, provided by the Department of Homeland Security, serves to instruct people on how to be prepared for terror attacks. For shits and giggles, go here and here.

They’re pretty high on my list.

Stuff I’ve Learned – The Pregnancy Edition

If all goes as planned, in two weeks I’ll be a dad. Some random things that I have learned, noticed, or done:

Male nesting. It’s real. You don’t have the uncontrollable urge to clean. What you will have is the uncontrollable urge to build stuff. In the last two weeks, I have built a workbench, a dog house, a growth chart, and a small wooden box. This is in addition to my ordinary tinkering (built a computer, added some modifications to my Ruger 10/22, and set up a home network).

Your body knows. You start sleeping less. I suppose it’s nature’s way of getting you ready for the sleepless nights you have coming.

Since I’m having a girl, I will apparently develop (in about 15 to 16 years) the desire to want to beat the crap out of every pimply faced kid that looks at her funny. Time to start learning to control that desire now.

Apparently, everything on the planet causes SIDS. Seriously. Particularly, anything you may get secondhand has an increased risk of causing SIDS. It’s true. The result, we bought all new stuff. Sounds to me like a scam by the people who make new stuff.

Even though everything causes SIDS, no one knows what causes SIDS. It’s totally true. Ask your doctor. They’ll tell you they don’t know. But they do know that secondhand stuff causes it. It’s really strange.

You cannot get out of Babies R Us without spending at least $300.

Two common features of baby stuff: 1) It’s expensive; and 2) it’s disposable. Two hundred dollar car seat will be outgrown in only a few months.

On sex, neither you nor your partner have the desire.

Some of the details of pregnancy are better left unknown to the father. Mucus plugs? Ick!

After attending birthing class, the video was all of the miracle of birth I want to ever see. The video shows some women you don’t know. I can’t imagine watching the woman I love go through that. I’ll be there, in the room, with my wife. I will not, however, play catch or in any way get on the business end of the deal.

The part that really scares the woman is, surprisingly, not the pain but the fact she may make number 2 in front of about four people.

When the baby first starts moving in such a way as it can be felt, as soon as your wife calls you over there to feel it, it will stop. This will frustrate you and annoy your wife who won’t be able to understand why you’re not as excited as her.

Later, it’s amazing to actually see what is identifiably the impression of a foot on a woman’s abdomen.

You will see strength in the woman you love you have never seen before. It is truly inspiring.

Your tax dollars at work

Citizens Against Government Waste blog reports:

“The Pentagon spent an estimated $100 million on airline tickets that were never used and didn’t seek refunds, a government investigation to be released today shows. The military also reimbursed employees as much as $8 million for tickets actually bought by the Defense Department, according to a second report from the General Accounting Office, an investigative arm of Congress.”

One more reason

Kevin shows us one more reason why SayUncle doesn’t reload nor does SayUncle purchase reloaded ammunition. Ouchie!

Quote of the day

From The Daily Show‘s Lewis Black (paraphrased):

Let me explain to you why hockey sucks. The country that invented it was beaten by a country that doesn’t care about it with a team that comes from a state where there’s no naturally occurring ice.

Big fat whopper of a lie for the day

Daniel R. Vice, a staff attorney for the Brady Center to Prevent Gun Violence:

This ruling will protect the public and police officers from the proven dangers of concealed weapons.

I’d like to see proof of these, ya know, proven dangers. In every case where concealed weapons laws have been passed, crime has decreased. This does not prove cause and effect but it definitely disproves the contention that CCW laws cause crime.

Gun, crime and the UK

Some interesting crime comparisons in the UK are here.

Libertarian Raided

Rick Stanley, former Libertarian candidate for Colorado Senate (aka, just some guy), had the pleasure of having his business raided and property seized:

Federal agents raided the Denver home and business of income tax opponent and gun rights advocate Rick Stanley on Wednesday, seizing materials said to be related to taxes and possible anti-government activity.

No federal charges have been filed against Stanley, and court documents relating to the raid remained sealed Wednesday. He did not return a telephone message left at his business, Stanley Fastener & Shop Supply on East 39th Avenue, where he also lives.

Federal officials were tight-lipped about the raid.

“A court-ordered search warrant was executed as part of a criminal investigation being conducted by the FBI and the IRS and other members of the Joint Terrorism Task Force,” said Jeff Dorschner, spokesman for the Colorado U.S. attorney’s office.

What exactly is anti-government activity? I mean, I have this here blog where I ramble on the many ways that our government sucks. Am I engaging in anti-government activity that would warrant raiding my home?

No charges filed and the agents aren’t talking. If they’re going to raid people’s houses, then I think the information about why ought to be made public. Stanley has been known to carry guns openly in defiance of the law and I’m pretty sure he advocated not paying income taxes.

And is tax evasion terrorism? Why is the Joint Terrorism Task Force involved if (as I’m lead to believe) it’s a tax issue?

Don’t get me wrong, Stanley is kind of a moonbat Libertarian. However, the sketchy details about this are troubling.

June 10, 2004

Disposable Media

Will Collier:

Memo to Matthew Furman: When 68% of your potential audience doesn’t trust you, you don’t have any reason to brag.

Now, to give Furman his due, while CNN’s trust numbers are horrible, they’re still miles beyond a couple of old-line news stalwarts. CBS News shuffles in at only 24% credibility, and the New York Times stumbles across the finish line at only 21%–and that’s among all the people surveyed. When the numbers were broken down along partisan lines, things got much, much worse.

Only 15% of Republicans believe what they see on CBS News. The numbers are scarcely better for NBC (16%) and ABC (17%). The Times clocks in at an unsurprising by still pathetic 14%. CNN easily tops all of the above, but still slides to 26%. According to the Pew analysis, “CNN’s once dominant credibility ratings have slumped in recent years, mostly among Republicans and independents.”

Look folks, this is a Big Deal, and I’m not even talking about media bias per se.

For all intents and purposes, more than half of the populace (everybody except partisan Democrats, and even their numbers for credibility are nothing for most of the press to brag about) has written off the vast majority of the national press. And they’re doing so because they believe that the press has written them off.

Things have gotten to the point where the President of the United States sees no reason not to ignore the networks and the New York Times. If the coin of your realm is trust, and influence is what you buy with that coin, what do today’s viewership realities say about the state of the realm?

The trust in the media continues its downward spiral in terms of trust (and, arguably, credibility). Actually, didn’t the Bush administration recently say pretty matter of factly that they don’t pay attention to the TV news?

Can we elect it?

Sadly, it’s more animated than the real John Kerry.

Dogs and language

An interesting study on a dog’s ability to understand or deduce the meaning of words states:

As many a dog owner will attest, our furry friends are listening. Now, for the doubters, there is scientific proof they understand much of what they hear.

German researchers have found a border collie named Rico who understands more than 200 words and can learn new ones as quickly as many children.

Patti Strand, an American Kennel Club board member, called the report “good news for those of us who talk to our dogs.”

“Like parents of toddlers, we learned long ago the importance of spelling key words like bath, pill or vet when speaking in front of our dogs,” Strand said. “Thanks to the researchers who’ve proven that people who talk to their dogs are cutting-edge communicators, not just a bunch of eccentrics.”

The researchers found that Rico knows the names of dozens of play toys and can find the one called for by his owner. That is a vocabulary size about the same as apes, dolphins and parrots trained to understand words, the researchers say.

Rico can even take the next step, figuring out what a new word means.

The researchers put several known toys in a room along with one that Rico had not seen before. From a different room, Rico’s owner asked him to fetch a toy, using a name for the toy the dog had never heard.

The border collie, a breed known primarily for its herding ability, was able to go to the room with the toys and, seven times out of 10, bring back the one he had not seen before. The dog seemingly understood that because he knew the names of all the other toys, the new one must be the one with the unfamiliar name.

“Apparently he was able to link the novel word to the novel item based on exclusion learning, either because he knew that the familiar items already had names or because they were not novel,” said the researchers, led by Julia Fischer of the Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology in Leipzig

I can attest that my dog understands a lot of words, though the context is important. Politically Incorrect Dog likely thinks that his name means No because the only time he hears his name is when he’s misbehaving.

On a related note, I knew a contractor who had a border collie that he took to work with him. One day, the contractor was working on a roof. Had I not seen it, I wouldn’t believe it. The dog would climb the ladder and stay on the roof with the contractor. The contractor could look at the dog and say the name of a tool, for example he’d say Hammer. The dog would descend the ladder, go to the contractor’s open tool box in the back of his truck, grab the hammer and take it back up the ladder to the contractor. Truly amazing. Even more amazing was that the dog could differentiate between a flathead and Phillips screwdriver. My wife can’t even do that.

What do Peter Garrett, the Crocodile Hunter, and the grandpa from South Park have in common?

They are the only people I can impersonate worth a damn and two of the three are Australian. Who is Peter Garrett? Glad you asked:

The former lead singer of the Australian rock band Midnight Oil announced Thursday that he will run for parliament with the opposition Labour Party — and party leaders said he could even become a government minister someday.

Peter Garrett (news), a committed environmental activist with a distinctive bald pate, had long used Midnight Oil as a forum for his political views. The band broke up in 2002 after 25 years.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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