A while back, Tom had a post that was to tackle (quite satirically) Libertarian solutions to common problems. It was pretty funny. In response, here’s my attempt at the liberal solution to this situation:

The other day, Kevin and I were coming back from lunch, and noticed a car double-parked in the lot. Now our lot is already overcrowded, and parking is at a premium, and here’s this jughead taking up two spaces.

Liberal solutions to parking problems:

First, we must form a committee to study the problem. Said committee will conclude that the existing law (i.e., which states double parking is illegal) is not enough; parking irregularities are out of control; and that citizens are incapable of making their own parking decisions.

Then, we will begin drafting new legislation. This legislation will create the Bureau of Parking Irregularities (BPI). Said bureau will be a special taskforce within the State Troopers Association, a subsidiary of our local Department of Justice.

The DOJ will appoint someone to head the BPI that is either:

A relative of a prominent official

A business associate of a prominent official

Some one who a prominent official thinks should hold higher public office some day

This person will be incompetent and appointed for life.

The BPI will be given free reign to draft policies and procedures to prevent the problem of double parking. They will draft solutions that include:

Mandating that all parking spaces in the area must meet minimum and maximum size requirements. These requirements will be set arbitrarily by some staffers surfing the web and will have no meaningful impact on parking irregularities, other than the fact that a standard sedan can’t fit in any of the spaces.

Mandating that all vehicles must be parked exactly parallel with lines in the parking space.

All lines in parking lots are to be painted orange.

The department will specify the distance from all sides of the vehicle to the lines painted on the parking spaces in inches.

There will be a five day waiting period on parking spaces.

The government will evoke Eminent Domain and all parking lots will be government property.

They will establish a hotline so that citizens can report parking irregularities. However, when you call the number, you will be connected to someone at the Department of Finance and Administration, who will have no idea what you’re talking about; no idea where to transfer you to; and will put you on hold until you give up and hang up the telephone.

They will offer incentives to police to crack down on parking irregularities. Suddenly and seemingly unexplainably, parking irregularity statistics will skyrocket. The BPI will now need more employees, facilities, and money to combat this massive increase in parking irregularities.

The fine for double parking will rise from $14 to $350.

A parking irregularity ad campaign will kick off. Unsurprisingly, no one will pay attention.

Later, a subcommittee formed by the BPI will conclude that certain vehicles are more likely to be involved in parking irregularities. Legislation will be drafted to register, tax, license, and regulate these vehicles separately from other vehicles. Eventually, a group of soccer moms will advocate banning these vehicles outright, prompting the formation of a vehicle rights group. The cost of these vehicles will double.

Al Gore will claim to have invented parking.

The BPI will be involved in litigation from the vehicle rights group who claim that such regulation infringes on citizens’ rights to park.

The BPI will form a vehicle buyback program.

In a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court will conclude that no one has a right to park.

The BPI will begin licensing parking spaces.

The cost of litigation and buyback programs will increase parking irregularity fines to $500 and one year in jail for each offense.

Jails will be overcrowded prompting a late night budget session to fund more prison space due to the rabid increase in crime our area is currently experiencing.

The mayor of San Francisco will issue parking space licenses to motorboats.

Al Sharpton will misunderstand the legislation involved and prove that on national TV.

The increased regulation of parking spaces will make businesses who maintain parking spaces less profitable. Central Parking will hire lobbyists and suddenly Republicans will oppose unreasonable parking regulations, until the money runs out.

Parking irregularity fines will increase to a maximum $10,000 fine and up to three years in prison.

George Bush will blame the increase in parking related crime on terrorism. He will push to federalize parking regulation and the Department of Parking Security will be created at a cost of $15B.

The Department of Parking Security will exempt judges, senators, and Sean Penn from following parking laws.

Kerry, who advocated the idea a year ago, will now oppose it.

Krugman, Franken, Coulter and Limbaugh will all say something really stupid about parking irregularities as the debate heats up in America.

Maureen Dowd will list a bunch of facts about parking. They will all be wrong.

By 2015, it will be illegal to park any where.

Smijer summarizes a certain supposed Libertarian’s conclusion:

If the 700 Club stays home over gay marriage, then they are helping the terrorists win.

Brutal Hugs links to a story about an assistant principle planting drugs on a student:

The excuse for framing a child for this crime was that he was suspected of dealing drugs, and they wanted to make sure he was caught.

Et tu, Georgia? Never thought I’d hear that phrase either. But there really is a bill. The bill is full of lies:

(a) The General Assembly finds:
(1) Semiautomatic assault weapons are military-style guns designed to quickly kill large numbers of people. The shooter can simply point, rather than carefully aim, the weapon to quickly spray a wide area with a hail of bullets;

No, sorry. You still have to aim it just like any other gun.

(2) According to data of the Federal Bureau of Investigation, between 1998 and 2001, one in five law enforcement officers slain in the line of duty was killed with an assault weapon;

Another lie.

(3) Gun manufacturers have for many years made, marketed, and sold to civilians semiautomatic versions of military assault weapons designed with features specifically intended to increase the lethality for military applications; and

No. The features listed do not affect a weapons’ lethality.

(4) Assault weapons have been used in some of America´s most notorious murders, including the 1999 massacre at Columbine High School and the 2002 Washington, D.C., area sniper shootings.

Uhm, no. The DC snipers used a post ban weapon and the Columbine kids used a Tec9, if I recall.

And go read the text of the law, it is quite amusing.

A Nader supporter and a Nader protester (never thought I’d hear of a Nader protester) square off.

Jeff has the weekly thing up, which addresses the Maryland ban and other issues.

Maryland gun stores report booming business of Assault Rifles, even though there’s a ban on them currently. That sounds familiar.

Ahnold quoted:

“In San Francisco, it is licence for marriage of same sex,” Schwarzenegger said yesterday on television. “Maybe the next thing is another city that hands out licences for assault weapons and someone else hands out licences for selling drugs. I mean, you can’t do that.” (sic – not so much sic really, as cultural differences)

The gun industry protection bill may have the Assault Weapons Ban attached to it.

A media outlet gets the facts about the ban right, for once:

They argued that anti-gun zealots have blurred the distinction between semiautomatic rifles, which fire one bullet each time the trigger is pulled, and fully automatic weapons, which continue to fire as long as the trigger is pressed. Fully automatic weapons are already severely restricted by federal law; the proposed state ban affects semiautomatic assault rifles.

“People assume wrongly that an assault weapon is fully automatic,” said Jim Moffitt, a 33-year-old surgical technologist from Frederick who bought a Ruger rifle for $350. “It’s a lack of education.”

Here’s a new one:

Proposed measures include preventing people from openly carrying guns into bars and restaurants that sell alcohol; letting local school boards decide, after holding a public hearing, whether they want to establish gun-free school zones; mandating criminal-background checks on all gun sales at gun shows; requiring training for people applying for concealed-handgun permits; and banning the sale of high-powered, .50-caliber assault rifles in Virginia.

Odd how last year those .50 caliber rifles were called .50-caliber sniper rifles. After all, an assault rifle is a weapon capable of automatic fire, that fires a light or medium powered bullet. Nope, no scaremongering here.

I predicted it a while back. And someone is floating the idea.

President Ahnold sounds a bit scary.

Got home last night from a friend’s. Prior to that, I was at the range with my father-in-law. Me and the Mrs. settle down to watch the final episode of Sex and the City and I start cleaning my guns. I look at the Mrs. and say: I’m probably the only person on the planet who has cleaned a gun while watching “Sex and the City.”

My name is SayUncle, and I’m a gun nut.

Because it makes it hard for us to get our suicide bombers into town. And that land grab think isn’t cool either.

If you’re going to write a letter to the editor that says the CCW in Utah is useless because no permit holder has defended a life, you should make sure your facts are straight.

Of course, those who opposed this said there would be blood in the streets. We haven’t seen much of that, now have we?

Hammond, Indiana is considering Breed Specific Legislation that states owners of pit bulls must:

* Carry a minimum of $300,000 in liability insurance in case of bodily injury or damage to property.
* Provide the city with two photographs, including a profile shot, of the pit bull.
* Pay a $50 fee to register pit bulls, as opposed to the $3 fee imposed for other breeds.
* Have no more than three pit bulls per household.
* Leash and muzzle pit bulls when outside the home or kennel.
* Implant pit bulls with a microchip as a means of permanent identification.
* Remove all newborn pit bulls from the city within six weeks of birth.
* And, post a “Beware of Dog” sign prominently on their property.

Taxing pit bulls and generally making them expensive to own. Additionally, they want to register dogs.

BSL doesn’t work.

It happened. Some one took another guy’s hard work and passed it off as their own. Lame.

Update: Well, the problem has been resolved. Good. But, geez folks, if you didn’t write it, at least put quotes around it.

Oh, and I love the fact they delete the comments of everyone who has pointed it out.

A while back, I harped on the Prince George’s Sentinel for an article on the Assault Weapons ban and actually got them to state that a correction of the error was forthcoming. As a result, Darren Harrison (the managing editor) asked me to write an op-ed on the ban. I did. Actually, I did with the help of Kevin Baker and Publicola.

Well, I sent the article that I wrote to him and haven’t heard back. I’m either getting blown off or they’re real busy. So, this is either an advanced copy for my readers or the only copy ever published. Regardless, here it is (let me know what you think):

Are you scared yet? Capitalizing on fear.

In Maryland, the debate over the federal Assault Weapons Ban, which is set to expire in September of this year, has heated up. There will be carnage in the streets! The end is nigh! Or is it?

The anti-gun crowd is playing on fear cultivated by the public’s misunderstanding of the current ban. People are lead to believe that the ban rids our streets of assault rifles. What is an assault weapon? That depends on the context. If you ask a member of the armed forces or a gun enthusiast, an assault weapon is a rifle capable of fully automatic fire that fires a medium caliber round. However, if you consult the text of the Assault Weapons Ban of 1994, an assault weapon is:

a semiautomatic rifle that has an ability to accept a detachable magazine and has at least 2 of- (i) a folding or telescoping stock; (ii) a pistol grip that protrudes conspicuously beneath the action of the weapon; (iii) a bayonet mount; (iv) a flash suppressor or threaded barrel designed to accommodate a flash suppressor; and (v) a grenade launcher

The difference between fully automatic and semiautomatic is substantial. A fully automatic rifle (AKA a machine gun) fires bullets at a high rate of speed so long as the trigger is pulled. Essentially, a fully automatic rifle sprays a constant barrage of bullets. A semiautomatic rifle fires one shot for one pull of the trigger. To gun enthusiasts, this distinction is widely known. Proponents of the Assault Weapons Ban would lead you to believe that the ban affects machine guns. It does not. The law does not even ban guns, per se. It merely limits the number of features (listed above) that new semiautomatic rifles can have.

Machineguns have been regulated in this country since the National Firearms act of 1934. For that matter, grenades and launchers have also been regulated since 1938. What does the Assault Weapons Ban actually do? Essentially, it allows a rifle to have either a folding stock, a pistol grip, a bayonet mount, or a flash suppressor. None of these four features (nor any combination thereof) make the rifle more deadly. The Assault Weapons Ban is about aesthetics. Though folding stocks are a regulated feature, it is rather irrelevant. You can still purchase short stocks or long stocks but the stock you purchase can’t have the ability to change from one size to the other. A pistol grip in no way makes a rifle any more deadly, it just alters the feel and appearance of the rifle. A flash suppressor redirects the muzzle flash of the gun to the sides of the muzzle instead of allowing the flash to go straight out of the muzzle, this does not affect firepower and doesn’t make the flash invisible. And drive-by bayoneting has ever been a problem.

Anti-gun groups are capitalizing on the misconceptions regarding the Assault Weapons Ban. They are taking advantage of the general public’s failure to distinguish between fully and semi-automatic weapons to push their agenda, which is gun control. After all, do you feel banning the features listed above really makes our streets safer? Even worse is the fact that the Violence Policy Center (VPC) has admitted to exploiting this fear. In reference to assault weapons, their website says:

The weapons’ menacing looks, coupled with the public’s confusion over fully automatic machine guns versus semi-automatic assault weapons—anything that looks like a machine gun is assumed to be a machine gun—can only increase the chance of public support for restrictions on these weapons

The VPC also makes many other equally ludicrous statements that attempt to portray semiautomatic rifles as machine guns:

Semiautomatic assault weapons (like AK and AR-15 assault rifles and UZI and MAC assault pistols) are civilian versions of military assault weapons. There are virtually no significant differences between them.

Fully automatic rifles and semiautomatic rifles have a very significant difference. The former are capable of fully automatic fire. The VPC does, at one point, differentiate between the two but offers that this is a distinction without a difference in terms of killing power. This is an equally ludicrous statement.

Additionally, the VPC states: The distinctive “look” of assault weapons is not cosmetic. It is the visual result of specific functional design decisions. They are referring to the regulated features listed above. The VPC even refers to such rifles as bullet hoses, which again implies they are machine guns.

The press eats these misconceptions up. When you see a story about the Assault Weapons Ban, the press is quick to show images of machine guns, even though the ban does not address them in any way. Even CNN, in May of 2003, mislead by Sheriff Ken Jenne of Broward County, Florida, implied that assault weapons were more powerful and that the Assault Weapons Ban applied to machineguns. CNN subsequently corrected the story. Was this willful ignorance to push an agenda as many pro-gun people think? No, it appears that CNN fell for the Assault Weapons Ban propaganda issued by anti-gun groups.

The Sentinel fell for the same thing. John Erzan wrote that the bill targeted . . . weapons that can fire multi rounds with just a squeeze of the trigger. The managing editor has stated that a correction of the error is forthcoming. The Catonsville Times also had to retract a story claiming the Assault Weapons Ban targeted fully automatic weapons. The misinformation spread unintentionally by the press does influence people’s decision about the issue.

Not only are the distinctions between fully and semi-automatic; and banning rifles vs. banning features important, the crime statistics show that the Assault Weapons Ban has had no meaningful impact on crime (actually, a recent study by the Centers for Disease Control failed to find any correlation between any gun control laws – particularly bans that that target specific guns – and changes in crime statistics). The VPC released a study that concluded that of the 211 police officers killed in the line of duty from 1998 to 2001, 41 were killed with assault weapons. The problem is that this statistic includes guns that are not legally assault weapons. Analyze the VPC’s own data (which is questionable) and you will find that 19 police officers were killed with “assault weapons” as legally defined. Study further and you will also discover that the number of annual police deaths by firearm has been apparently unaffected by the relative explosion from the mid 1980’s of “assault weapons” (as defined by the VPC) into the general populace.

Other key facts about crime and the assault weapons ban:

Nationally, “assault weapons” were used in 1.4% of crimes involving firearms and 0.25% of all violent crime before the enactment of any national or state “assault weapons” ban.

The ban covered only 1.39% of the models of firearms on the market, so the bans effectiveness is automatically constrained. (sic)

To conclude, here is an amusing quote by Deputy Chief of Police Joseph Constance of Trenton NJ, who testified before the Senate Judiciary Committee in Aug 1993 before the passage of the 1994 Assault Weapons Ban:

Since police started keeping statistics, we now know that assault weapons are/were used in an underwhelming 0.026 of 1% of crimes in New Jersey. This means that my officers are more likely to confront an escaped tiger from the local zoo than to confront an assault rifle in the hands of a drug-crazed killer on the streets.

The always excellent Publicola has more on the guns and gays issues. Funny how, when it suits them, some liberals sound, uhm, libertarian. Well, as long as it doesn’t involve guns, taxes, social programs, funding for the crap arts, etc.

My last attempt at creating some sort of infectious list to spread through the blogosphere was a miserable failure. Here’s another attempt. List your top 10 cover songs. That is, a song that was released after someone else already released it. In no particular order:

1. Soft Cell – Tainted Love: A hit in the sixties for Gloria Jones, redone with 80s flair. I think this song was the number one single for a very long time.

2. Limp Bizkit – Faith: Who knew a George Michael tune could be so angry?

3. Driver – White Lines: Metal meets Grandmaster Flash and the furious five.

4. The Gourds: Gin and Juice: Mandolins and hippie groove meet Snoop.

5. Dynamite Hack – Boyz in the Hood: The last rap tune cover on the list. This song is amazing.

6. REM – Word Up: I’ve only heard it live during REM’s encore shows but it rocks. Cameo had nothing on these guys. Too bad they sucked the last several albums. I may have lied but I don’t know if Cameo is considered rap.

7. Dinosaur Jr. – Just Like Heaven: Another tune that I’ve only heard live or live recordings of. Who knew a Cure tune could be so in your face?

8. Jimi Hendrix – All Along the Watchtower: ‘Nuff said.

9. Anthrax – Got the Time: I’m one of many folks who thought he was saying Got a time chicken in my head. What’s a time chicken? Regardless, this song rules.

10. Whatever song you’re thinking of that I left off the list. That way, no one is offended.

Update: Any Johnny Cash cover. Personal Jesus, Hurt, and Rusty Cage all rule.

Update2: It’s The Gourds not BNL.

The Everlasting Phelps. Good stuff. But he thinks I’m a monkey. Go figure. And he’s funny.

He may as well. FoxNews reports his advisers say he’s going to run.

Said Kerry: Oh shit.

Peggy and Tom both take issue with a comparison of gun rights and gay rights I mentioned here. Tom says:

I like it. However, I do feel compelled to point out that it would awfully difficult for somebody to kill me with their homosexuality, so it’s not exactly a valid comparison…

Peggy says:

That guy made the classic apples & oranges mistake, so no wonder someone cried foul fruit.

First let me be clear, I support the right of homosexuals to get married and I support this act of civil disobedience. However, I tend to think this whole incident may well prove disastrous for gay rights instead of helping the cause. In the same way, if the man who wrote the letter actually did walk into SF with an AR15, he wouldn’t be doing gun owners a big favor either. I would still applaud him.

The incidents, however, are quite the same. Each is a peaceful protest to laws that are viewed as unjust.

The right to arms is constitutionally guaranteed. The right to keep and bear your homosexual marriage is not. Of course, I wonder what the opinions of gay gun nuts are on the issue?

States that allow Tennessee Handgun Permit owners to carry: By combining info from this site with the functionality of this site, below is a map of states where I can legally carry a gun. Neato.

One more thing, the list of states doesn’t include Vermont, but I’m pretty sure I can carry there too.
Read the rest of this entry »

You’ll find this guy:

Aryanfest’s gates opened at noon, and about an hour later, the gathering assemblage gradually hushed as all eyes turned upon the young man who had just paid his entrance fee and was casually perusing the hate-rock compact discs, swastika flags and white power watch caps at Panzerfaust Records’ merchandise booth.

He was in his late teens or early 20s, had a shaved head and sported Nazi and white power tattoos on both arms, in addition to wearing the white tee shirt with bold, black script.

He would have fit in just fine, except for one thing: He wasn’t white. Not even close. There was at least half a cup of Kahlúa in his cream.

Beautiful! Hats off to you, sir!

Quote:

I just wanted to come out and show my respect for the white race and support the cause.

Via Kevin.

It seems that gun control is working pretty much as usual in Haiti.

Yup. Drugs are still winning the war on civil liberties err some drugs.

Jeffrey Tucker:

First an inventory to establish what I mean:

You have the vague sense that your bed linens are not so much comforting you as hemming you in, restricting you and just not breathing as they should;

To clean your bathtub and kitchen sink requires an inordinate amount of cleanser and bleach;

Whereas you remember showers that once refreshed you, they now leave you only feeling wet;

It should be pleasure to put on a bright white crisp undershirt but instead it seems rather routine, dull, even uneventful;

The mop has a dusky smell of an old rag and you keep having to replace it to get rid of the reappearing and never disappearing stink;

Your dinner tonight reminds you of your dinner last night and that night before, and the flavors seem to be piling up into one big haze

His suggestion, up your water heater to 130 degrees. Me and the Mrs. upped ours to 125 a while back. Typical default is 120.

A guy sent a letter to San Francisco politicos that says in part:

I am a gun owner and I live a gun owner life style.

I don’t know if I was born with a tendency to be this way, or if it was an acquired disposition. All I know is, I don’t see why I should be forced to change. Truth be known, I like owning guns, and am happy with who I am. I hope I suffer no repercussions by “coming out of the safe,” but I just can’t hide the truth any longer.

We gun owners have been living and working among you. Our kids go to school with yours. We may be your doctor, or minister, or your child’s teacher. We may even work in city administration, or the courts, or on the police force. And we are sick of being abused for simply being who we are, all because of hoplophobic prejudice and fear. We don’t see any reason why we should have to put up with it any more.

Which brings me back to my dilemma and the reason I am writing you.

You have shown progressive thinking and tolerance for that which the majority condemns. So I was thinking of coming up to San Francisco and exercising my right to keep and bear arms, maybe showing up at City Hall with a state-banned AR-15 and a couple 30-round magazines, and also carrying several pistols concealed without a permit.

He’s referring to the gay marriage licenses. For his troubles, he’s under investigation by the police. One thing, I don’t like the authors after the fact defense that the letter was satirical. Stick to your guns, man.

If he loses, it will be because of people who have historically voted Republican but are more libertarian, will not vote for him. Also, the Christian right is threatening to stay home on election day.

If Bush were smart, he’d stop trying to appease some liberals with his spending habits. After all, they hate him any way.

WBIR writes about Frist making moves for a possible 2008 Presidential run. I predicted that back in March.

The Tennessee legislature has bill pending that would place the responsibility of fee hikes on the Tennessee Wildlife Resources Commission. This way, when fees are raised, Tennessee’s sportsmen won’t get mad at their senators. That is quite lame.

Senators in Mississippi have exempted themselves from the ban on firearms on capitol grounds. See, they’re special and deserve special privilege, just like vets with war trophies; Sean Penn getting a gun permit despite a criminal record; retired police officers being allowed to carry; and judges in DC.

New Hampshire is looking into dropping the permits to carry altogether. This would allow anyone to carry without a permit, much like Alaska and Vermont.

Took the new toy to the range today. How’d it do?

That is at 50 yards. And I was shooting as quickly as I could re-acquire the target. The entire diameter of that target (the whole round portion of the target, not the 10 in the center) is three inches. The group measured 3/4 inch.

Not too bad.