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Registered sex offender at the age of 3

Well, he would be. Because a policeman is a retard.

12 Responses to “Registered sex offender at the age of 3”

  1. rickn8or Says:

    Damn, I gotta move there; crime rate must be really low if the cops got time to spend on such as this.

    And I’d really REALLY want to be on the jury for this trial… “Not only did we find the defendant not guilty your honor, but the vote was unanimous to slap the cop for being a dumb ass. Furthermore, we recommend the arresting officer be fined court costs and defendant’s legal fees.”

  2. Kristophr Says:

    The policeman is not a retard. His pay and promotion is based on writing these tickets.

    Apparently his supervisors have not been stepping on officers that pad their record with bullcrap like this. If he wrote this one, you can bet he, and everyone else there, has a raft of similar stuff written. They gave their tacit approval to this to pad their own reviews.

    This became a problem not because it was bad ( even though it was ). It became a problem because it got unfavorable media coverage.

  3. Gerry Says:

    Yes he is a retard, the chief and mayor think he’s a retard.

    Bets are on that his mom thinks he’s a retard.

  4. Bubblehead Les Says:

    Sounds like he could be Chief of Detectives for the Canton, Ohio P.D. to me!

  5. Geodkyt Says:

    IF the cop keeps his job, he should be reassigned to duties more suited to his skillset.

    Since he likes checking out urination so much, he should get a permanent billet as the designated Meat Gazer for any and all male drug tests his department conducts.

    Given that I’ve never met ANYONE on Meat Gazer duty who was happy about it, this seems appropriate.

  6. Wyowanderer Says:

    If he agreed to have a job where retard behavior is required, he is indeed a retard.

  7. mikee Says:

    I recall when my son was 2 to 3 and gaining control over his bladder. We lived in Baltimore, MD, at the time.

    I learned where every public bathroom was from the Inner Harbor to Johns Hopkins Hospital to the Albertson’s grocery in Towson, and could get him into one of them about as fast as it took him to say, “Hey, Dad, I gotta go.” If you saw a man holding a toddler, running through a department store, that was me. If he so much as squirmed the wrong way, he found himself plucked up, transported to a toilet, stripped down and ready to go in nothing flat.

    I distinctly recall driving through one of Baltimore’s tonier suburbs when he used that special tone of voice to let me know 15 seconds was all the time I had before the car seat became a slip&slide. I pulled over, and he was peeing in the gutter within moments. My wife was a little taken aback, but my son thought it perfectly natural.

    And I guess that is the point. When a little boy’s gotta go, he’s gotta go.

    The only problem I ever had with this was when my daughter was 2 to 3, out back playing with a neighbor’s son of the same age. I saw the boy head into the shrubbery, drop trou, and let go. My daughter followed him, watched, and tried to do the exact same thing, with poor results. It took a lot of talking to explain to a barely 3 year old that plumbing was different on boys and girls, and how to squat.

  8. Kristophr Says:

    Gerry: The retard was the person at the top that set up systematic rewards for this bad cop behavior.

    How much do you want to bet that they pay the victims off, have the cop lay low for a bit, and fail to change anything?

    Because that would mean that the guy really responsible for this would have to admit to being a window licking retard.

  9. Gerry Says:

    I’m not seeing any reward for his being a retard by his boss. Having your ticket publicly ridiculed by the chief and mayor is never an endorsment of your behavior or a career enhancer.

    This is not to say they are not retards as well.

  10. Sid Says:


    His mom is proud that her boy has a job. After all, she had to sleep with the principal to get her son admitted despite the fact that he scored 5 little ole points below the state standard to be enrolled in public school.

  11. Jailer Says:

    Yet another reason why I live in the country…….

  12. Kristophr Says:

    Gerry: the reward is that lots of tickets = more funding.

    Everything works out find for the person in charge, until a cop gets too enthusiastic, and his efforts hit the evening news.