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Cashiers Checks

Closing today. We refinanced (4.5% for 15 years, if you must know). As part of the closing, I have to take a cashiers check. Well, they’ve run every financial stress test on me they can and I’m more liquid than Bank of America, which isn’t saying much. They know what I got, where it’s at, and where it’s coming from. Why not just take, say, my check. They know I have it. I have to make an extra stop and pay a fee now.

I ought to just show up with a few thousand in one dollar bills to see what happens.

14 Responses to “Cashiers Checks”

  1. Weer'd Beard Says:

    Or at least in fives. Maybe the bank will even have some of the really cruddy worn-out fives you can use.

  2. Mikee Says:

    Sure, you have the money – but the recent economic crisis indicates that a heck of a lot of other guys sure didn’t.

    Having been through many closings, may I suggest you laugh it up and enjoy yourself – or at least act that way. At best everyone else there will be pleasant and all the paperwork will go well. At worst, everyone will wonder what they did wrong, to make you so happy with the deal.

  3. countertop Says:

    pennies

  4. Adam Says:

    Well, if the deal goes south and you still have all those ones…you could really have a great weekend.

    lol

  5. Thirdpower Says:

    I had to use a Cashiers Check w/i the same bank but different departments.

  6. ZerCool Says:

    See, someone suggested it, so now I have to figure out how much it would weigh in pennies…

    I tossed the three pennies in my pocket on my reloading scale. 0.266oz/3 = 0.088oz/cent. (These are all post-1988 pennies, btw, meaning the lighter copper-clad zinc instead of all-copper.)

    We’ll use the nice round number of $5000.00 as the money you took to closing. (My bank is showing me a MUCH bigger number, but I’m purchasing, not refinancing.)

    $5000.00 = 500,000 pennies.
    500,000*0.088 = 44,000oz
    44,000oz/16(oz/lb) = 2750lb

    So … you’d need at least a full-ton pickup (F250+)… Ford publishes the bed load capacity of the F250 as 2800lb with single-cab 4wd …

    So if you’d refi using pennies, you could justify a new truck, and support Detroit and American workers in the process!

    (I wonder what the volume of that pile of pennies would be…?)

  7. Mikee Says:

    500,000 pennies, piled neatly in columns and lined up in a checkerboard pattern takes up 14,062.5 cubic inches, or 8.138 cubic feet, about half the size of a refrigerator’s interior.

    One could stack them in the “close packed” pattern, a hexagon with a penny in the center and 6 more around it, and save some volume, but either way, you need the big truck.

    And legally, I have read/heard/seen on old TV shows that pennies are legal tender only up to 50 cents, (somebody tried this idea with the IRS a while back) so while the idea is cool, the bank could just ask you to remove that pile of copper/zinc from their lobby.

  8. Metulj Says:

    It’s even more difficult when you use USAA. Trust me.

  9. karrde Says:

    Technically, it was in 1982 when they switched from copper to alloy in pennies.

    I do wonder what the bank would do if you walked up and asked for several thousand dollars in small change. (Or even 20’s…)

  10. Ach Says:

    “I do wonder what the bank would do if you walked up and asked for several thousand dollars in small change.”

    If you give them enough notice, they can probably service such requests. Banks only keep so much cash on hand, and if you have an odd request, they may not be able to service it without plenty of warning. Similarly, if it is the holiday season, they may ration how much cash you can withdraw: they have many possible customers, and aren’t going to let 1 person come in and clean them out – even if the customer’s bank account supports it. Also, make sure you actually have an account at the bank you are about to bother. If you don’t, they’ll almost certainly tell you to go to hell – if phrased in a nicer fashion.

  11. cryptical Says:

    Too bad the government has specifically forbidden melting pennies for the metal value, pre-82 pennies are worth 1.41 cents. It wouldn’t be all profit, but 41% gross? I’d have to quit my job to sort pennies all day.

    I wouldn’t have to do it by hand, the new pennies are about 2.5 grams, and the old copper ones are 3.11. There’s gotta be some sort of sorting machine that can tell the difference.

  12. HardCorps Says:

    You dumb, cousin humping gun owners stop confusing things with your maths.

    Cash is King.

  13. Knob Creeker Says:

    Cryptical,

    I don’t know of any machines that sort pennies by weight, but there is a quick way to check if they are the older copper (actually bronze or brass: 95% copper, 5% zinc or zinc and tin) or newer zinc (97.5% zinc core, 2.5% copper plating) pennies. A copper penny will “ring” when you drop it on a hard surface, while a zinc penny makes a dull thud. Find a penny made before 1982 (other than a 1943 steel penny) and another made after 1982, drop them one at a time on your desk/wood floor, and you will notice a distinctly different sound from each one. This is handy trick to sort 1982 pennies because they were made with both compositions.

  14. straightarrow Says:

    I do not know the details or your refinance, but I hope your great rate is accompanied by a shorter mortgage term. Even if not, good for you, my hope was just a hoped for extension of your good fortune, incorporating your lower payments with a shorter term of payment.

    I hope you die rich. And not too soon, either.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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