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Like you didn’t see this coming

What a douchebag.

12 Responses to “Like you didn’t see this coming”

  1. Robb Allen Says:

    I don’t care who you are, that’s funny.

  2. SayUncle Says:

    That’s some kinda (blank)ery!

  3. Bruce Says:

    They can have the D, O, U, C, H, E, B, A, and G keys from my keyboard when they pry them from my bitter, dead fingers.

  4. Les Jones Says:

    Oh! Snap!

  5. Stickwick Stapers Says:

    You know what’s weird? When “that’s so five minutes ago” became, like, so five minutes ago.

  6. Achmed Says:

    “That’s so five minutes ago” totally jumped the shark…

  7. Tam Says:


  8. SayUncle Says:

    gag me with a spoon.

  9. Lyle Says:

    But we can still say something is “cool”? What about “groovy, Baby”? When I was in high school, things were often “boss” or “bitchin'” or even “skookum” and sometimes “righteous”. Males were “dudes” and females were “chicks”, unless you were having a relationship with one of them, in which case a dude was your “old man” and a chick was your “old lady”. Later, “squeeze” was applied to either.

    ZOMFG, I’m so confused!!!! (and what about the use of multiple exclamation points?) Now I’m going to need a full-time counselor to tell me what’s hip and what’s like, all kinds of un-hip, Dudes! OMG!!!!!!

    The post left out “douchebagology” (/doosh b GOLL uh jee/; the study of douchebags– their feeding habits, social structure, mating habits, etc.). This discussion is a study in douchebagology, or more specifically, douschebagisms (the vernacular of douchebags) and those douchebags who worry about them.

  10. Eric Says:

    So much censorship and he left out “bling bling”?

    Tragic. Unamerican, even.

  11. Les Jones Says:

    He’s just joshing you. He’ll buy you a beer!

  12. Bruce Says:

    If we’re going to outlaw anything, let’s get rid of “You owe me a new keyboard”, “Great, now I have to clean coffee out of my keyboard”, etc.

    Go with “I just laughed coffee out of my eye sockets, thanks a lot”, instead.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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