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7 Responses to “New Product”

1. Cactus Jack Says:
   August 18th, 2008 at 12:30 pm

   LOL! I love it!

   “You’ll notice a difference after just one use,” said Michelle Baker, head of new product development. “Whether it’s your newborn’s more hardened appearance, the way he now approaches people with guarded skepticism, or just that look on his face that says, ‘Oh wait, maybe life isn’t all hugs and kisses and rainbows. Maybe I need to get my fucking act together.'”

   It’s targeted on libs.

2. Scott Says:
   August 18th, 2008 at 1:32 pm

   Clearly neocons. As a Libertarian, I try to shelter my children from all the horrors of large institutions/bureaucracies/government. In fact, permanently.

   SB

3. ka Says:
   August 18th, 2008 at 2:05 pm

   Kid: This is madness.
   Leonidas (Shoving shampoo in kids eyes): This is Sparta!

4. Rustmeister Says:
   August 18th, 2008 at 2:24 pm

   I’m thinking it’s for the HopeChange crowd. At least it should be. 🙂

5. Lyle Says:
   August 18th, 2008 at 5:24 pm

   It’s for neocons. Libertarians would be more interested in illustrated “children’s versions” of Ayn Rand’s essays on capitalism. (hmm…maybe there’s a market niche there.)

   Gotta love theOnion. I get all my news, information and wisdom from them.

6. Les Jones Says:
   August 18th, 2008 at 8:06 pm

   “I can’t decide if this is targeted toward libertarian parents or neoconservative parents”

   Trial lawyer parents would be my guess. 🙂

7. Justthisguy Says:
   August 18th, 2008 at 8:44 pm

   Hmm, I might have turned out better if they’d had something like that when I was small, maybe not so extreme, though; ya gotta titrate the mental message to the receiving capacity of the kid.

   Yep, I’m taking this one a little bit seriously. My parents made my life too easy for me when I was a kid (IMHO) and I think that I have suffered from that, later.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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