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Your government at work

I’ve yammered before about how it’s almost a full-time job at mid-sized companies just dealing with .gov agencies. Today’s moment of smart comes (again) from the US Census Bureau which has sent some census forms to fill out. They have sent me no less than 300 pages of forms and instructions and threats that if I don’t do it, ninjas will come arrest me. Of course, the trouble is that all of these forms have to do with the trucking industry. We’re not in the trucking industry. Or even close. 300 pages of NA is fun.

14 Responses to “Your government at work”

  1. countertop Says:

    And of course, each one of the 300 is, by itself, both “a reasonable request” and “necessary” information to the ongoing survival of the nation and protection of the public welfare.

  2. _Jon Says:

    heed my experiences and don’t cross them buggers. They know stuff about you and will use it.

    /grumble

  3. Regolith Says:

    I usually toss those things. Granted, I’m not a business, so its a bit harder for them to do anything about it. But nothing happened, and that was over a year ago.

  4. Michael Hawkins Says:

    You feel secure after a year?

    You know how long it takes for them to put up a traffic sign? How long do you think it’ll take them to wade through hundreds of pages of information?

  5. Regolith Says:

    I live in an apartment, and the envelope was marked “Resident Of.” My guess is they randomly chose addresses, and mailed them out, and when I didn’t send in their second request they figured the place must be vacant.

  6. Jim W Says:

    Unless it is certified mail and you signed for it, I would throw it in the recycler.

    Not a lawyer, not legal advice, ass covered, etc.

  7. retro Says:

    Long post…

    About 2 and a half years ago I relocated from a major metropolitan area of over 1 million people to a town of less than 2,500 people. I did this mostly because life in the city had simply become overly oppressive (to my standards, anyway) plus they had just imposed a County tax (on top of State and Federal taxes) and being single, it was killing me.

    Anyway long story short(er)… A month after relocating, I received a census packet from the fedgov. I opened it, read a few of the extremely invasive questions and promptly tossed the whole lot into the trash can.

    About three weeks later I received another packet, this one with bright red letters on the front of the envelope informing that I was “obliged by law” to respond with all sorts of implied threats if I didn’t respond.

    Once more I tossed into the whole packet into the trash. Didn’t even open this one.

    Then about three more weeks pass when one afternoon, the doorbell rang.

    Lo and behold, it was Nanny in all her glory (a tiny little woman with a big government badge) and she asked me why I had not responded to their “simple inquiry”. I explained that I felt it was an invasion of my privacy and that all they really needed to know was how many people lived here, not what we did for a living, whether we used public transportation and how often, or what each persons income was, or how far everyone had gone in school. She really wanted to come in and set up her laptop and go through the other 250 questions on the forms but I told her, in no uncertain terms, that “there’s one person living in this house. Me. And that’s all the information I’m giving you. Good-bye.” And closed the door.

    Nanny left and I’ve never seen or heard from her again. It’s been more than 2 years now… Is it over? I doubt it. I’m sure I’m on someone’s list as a result, but do I care?

  8. helen Says:

    Key to all this crap is never, EVER, talk to these goons. Anything you say will likely include enough information to tell them that you received their paperwork. That you received the paperwork is the prosecutors hardest burden of proof in cases like this. Unless, of course, you help convict yourself by admitting to it.

    Close the door and go get Smallest Minority’s new doormat, which reads, “COME BACK WITH A WARRANT”

    Even than, make no statements without a lawyer present. (There is a reason this nation has an overflowing jail problem, and it isn’t because we’ve rounded up all the criminals and locked them away). We have a rigged system that will fry your innocent ass. No matter how innocent you THINK you are, they can ALWAYS find a crime and a jury willing to convict.

  9. jed Says:

    This is just like all the other crap the feddies pull, even though it’s outside the bounds of the Consitution. Article 1, Section 2 authorizes only the enumeration of persons, nothing else.

  10. straightarrow Says:

    helen truly understands.

  11. Dustin Says:

    Yeah I’d just toss it in the trash. They can’t prove I ever received it. My mail gets lost all the time.

    Like Reagan said – the scariest words in the English language are: “I’m from the government, and I’m here to help”

    Get lost.

  12. Robert Says:

    I’ve had those packets. It’s quite an implied threat. They DO call or send someone around later. I gave them the “not available” run around and and finally they wandered off. They did go through a couple of different temporary employees before they quit. They are just part time workers trying to fill their quote, it seemed. It’s a heck of a packet of questions. How many esquimos live here? How far do they commute to work? How much do they make? et, et…

    Who the heck do these people think they are?

  13. _Jon Says:

    Well, I’ve posted here before on this, hence my earlier comment.
    In my case, they wanted the info on the people living in a rental house of mine.
    Eventually, I started getting phone calls on my personal cell phone while I was at work.
    One of the tenants told me she waited until he got home, then blocked the driveway by standing in it until he answered some of her questions.

    Rude, pushy, arrogant, and intimidating.

    Also, as some of the other people have mentioned, they are Federal Government Employees. The point to keep in mind there is that if you tell them anything that they mis-record, you have lied to a Federal Employee / Agent. Ask a few high-profile criminals how much fun you can have when the FedGov decides you have lied to it.

  14. gHolb Says:

    Folks, you’ve got the wrong attituds!

    What’s wrong with the census employees is this:

    1) There are not enough of them. We need to “invest” in this vital program by tripling the workforce before the next census.

    2) Two-thirds of these will be used to create longer, and more intrusive questionairres.

    3) One-third will be used to watch the 1st two-thirds.

    4) Initially, all census takers will have speed dial on their cell phones for the local SWAT line.

    5) As soon as practical, all census takers will be armed with sidearms denied to the rest of us.

    There. That ought persuade you whiners about your so-called-privacy rights and the good intentions of Nanny.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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