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Guns: No! But a rat tail comb, OK

Via David, comes this advice from the Illinois State Police on dealing with sexual assault. They say don’t use guns because:

# Guns stolen from residences are a primary way of getting guns into the hands of criminals.
# Half of all the women that fire a gun trying to protect themselves shoot someone they do not want to

But police approved weapons include:

* nail file
* rat tail comb
* teasing brush
* pens and pencils
* keys
* anything rigid


8 Responses to “Guns: No! But a rat tail comb, OK”

  1. #9 Says:

    The Bloomberg “Mayors against all guns” manifesto carried out to its logical conclusion.

    Where is Mayor Haslam on the Bloomberg group? Still a member.

  2. Trevor Says:

    I guess taking a weapons handling course would be too much effort.

    Anything rigid will have to do in a pinch.

  3. straightarrow Says:

    Well we know which rigid member the State Police are using on the citizens of their state with advice like that. Another way of saying ….well, you know.

  4. JustDoIt Says:

    Reminds me of that moron DEA agent in the classroom full of kids, “I’m the only one in this room professional enough to handle this firearm.”

    Blam! [shoots self in foot]

    D’oh! Priceless…

  5. Never wear overalls" « Tiny Cat Pants Says:

    […] Courtesy of Say Uncle, we have another bit of advice, this time from the Illinois State Police–”Don’t shoot your attacker; let him get close enough to you where you can stab him.” […]

  6. Ravenwood Says:

    Isn’t owning keys just as bad as owning guns? That’s probably a primary way of getting stolen vehicles into the hands of criminals.

  7. nk Says:

    I live in Illinois. We are talking about assholes whose family and friends have the assholes’ business cards with the words “Please help my friend as much as you can” written on the back as de facto carry permits.

  8. Housewife Says:

    I need to let y’all in on a secret

    So I’ll say it loud and clear.

    I will not be ruining a perfectly good pair of Manolos on someone who attacks me.

    Rather I will shoot them from a reasonable distance, thus saving me the hassle of heading off to the dry cleaner.

    Although I am not a law enforcement officer (therefore completely unqualified to make a statement such as this) I do believe that my Smith and Wesson will protect me better than my keys to the Toyota.

    Yup, it’s a real leap of faith, but I’m rollin’ with it anyhow….