Now, what do you do again?
First up is firing people: it sucks and I don’t recommend it. Every time I’ve had to do it, it wasn’t for cause (which I would think would be easier) but because positions get eliminated, restructuring, or insert other feel good business lingo here. And whenever I’ve had to do it, I felt like a bag of dicks after. But this ain’t a post about that. This is a post about this:
Currently, yours truly is seeking other employment options. The Mrs., who is always helpful, decided that she’d spend a portion of her lunch hour helping me in my search. She then sent me a list of opportunities that she thought I’d be interested in. That’s when it occurred to me: She has absolutely no idea what I do for a living.
Then, I had to update ye old résumé. Now, I’ve always abided by the rule that your résumé should be one page. Trouble is, not all the awesome and amazing shit I’ve done will fit on one page. Apparently, that’s no longer the rule as the four or so folks I’ve hired in the past year all had multiple page résumés. So, for the first time, I’ve expanded it to two pages. And it left me feeling quite unnerved.
So, last night, I asked the Mrs. to proofread my now updated, two-page résumé. She then informed me that, while it didn’t contain any spelling/grammatical errors that she could find, she didn’t know what half the stuff on there meant. Again, she has absolutely no idea what I do for a living.
October 26th, 2005 at 10:43 am
hmmm, that’s strange, neither do I. How about you inform us? I assume it has something to do with tupperware.
October 26th, 2005 at 10:54 am
Heh. I do not work for GLOCK. But that would be cool.
October 26th, 2005 at 12:47 pm
You would not believe how many calls from recruiters and headhunters I have gotten just by having my resume online.
October 26th, 2005 at 3:35 pm
Then you weren’t firing them. You were laying them off.
[/feel-good business lingo]
Try being in IT some time. Nobody (except my co-workers, and not even all of them) knows what I do for a living. Instead, my wife resorts to the dreaded “he’s in computers.” Which means that every relative on the planet thinks I can help them with their PC problem. And I have to admit, even I often use the stupid “I’m in computers” line, just because it’s easier than trying to explain what it is I actually do.
October 26th, 2005 at 3:52 pm
I have found it much easier to say “I’m in computers”. It is quick. People generally know what a computer is. Once people hear you are in computers they generally don’t care anymore. If they do care, they want you to fix their home computer or complain about their business computers, networks, support reps, etc. I am glad I am not a doctor. I would hate to hear how people respond when they find out you are a doctor.
October 26th, 2005 at 6:09 pm
I have many times explained what I do to my girlfriend. She has even watched me program…to no avail. She still has no idea what i do for a living.
Oh BTW, i am in computers.
October 26th, 2005 at 7:21 pm
Hell, that’s easy. I guessed what you did before you hit the end of the sentence. I know several folks who do exactly what YOU do only for bigger corporations. I’m not sure HOW you would get it all on two pages, much less one.
But that’s just modern life.
Are you sure you wouldn’t like to try something a little more direct? Like say, plumbing or cattle-gutting? Something you could get your hands on and into. You just don’t quite seem like the type.
But, there are all types of folks who do exactly what you do.
October 27th, 2005 at 9:11 pm
Hell, my BOSS doesn’t know what I do. And that is the way I like it. I usually just tell people “snake handler” if they ask me what I do. (I think that is what I told you.) And it really isn’t that inaccurate. (If you agree that lawyers are snakes.)