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Kelo insurrection

I think, instead of sending lawyers, guns and money; someone needs to head to New London with a truckload of spotted owls, snail darters, and bald eagles . Once you turn them loose, all construction there would stop immediately. Thoughts?

20 Responses to “Kelo insurrection”

  1. Jay G Says:

    I could steal some piping plovers from Cape Cod…

  2. tgirsch Says:

    Of course, they’d still boot the people from their homes; they’d just be doing it for environmental protection (which I support) instead of economic development (not so much).

  3. ben Says:

    or just create a mud puddle

  4. Marc Says:

    Piss in the yard. There’s your mud puddle.

  5. Fz Says:

    Native American gravesite.

    A few chimpanzee bones, along with feathers and beads and a statement from Ward Churchill, will go a long way. No scientist will be allowed to examine the bones to disqualify them as human remains.

    If it’s going to be seized anyway, you might as well render it unusable to the private party that will end up with it.

  6. hellbent Says:

    There aren’t truckloads of spotted owls or snail darters. Get it?

    OK, so my joke might not be as funny as stale sniping about wetlands, but at least it’s not oblivious and retarded.

  7. SayUncle Says:

    Actually, you’re comments are oblivious and retarded. Your sense of humor is clearly retarded and you’re oblivious to the distinction between wetlands and endangered species.

    And I said a truckload (no plural). bald eagles are pretty big.

    Would you have liked the joke better if i said a few ounces of mercury or lead? Or two snail darters, two owls and two eagles?

  8. hellbent Says:

    Uncle, you said nothing about wetlands. One of the other commenters did. Try not to be so oblivious.

    Bald eagles, btw, were removed from the federal Endangered Species list in 1995, though they are still endangered in Connecticut. Snail darter was taken off the endangered species list in 1984.

  9. SayUncle Says:

    “One of the other commenters did”

    No, you said your joke about wetlands after referencing my species joke. Pick one story, and stick to it then I won’t have to interpret who you’re trying to insult.

  10. hellbent Says:

    My comment was about both. I read the whole thread, then commented. I think you’re all oblivious to the reality of endangered species and wetland laws and enforcement, and the comment about pissing in the yard to make a wetland is retarded.

  11. SayUncle Says:

    “I think youre all oblivious to the reality of endangered species and wetland laws and enforcement”

    You are wrong. Thinking something is kind of stupid when taken to certain levels doesn’t mean oblivious.

  12. ben Says:

    Dear Hellbent,

    don’t be such a sour puss. We, meaning us, not you, were laughing at hypothetical situations andn stupid government regulations that would contradict one another and tie the government in funny knots. That’s all. The details of the wetlands and endangered species laws aren’t really important to the discussion.

    And yeah, the jokes were kinda retarded, but that is the nature of some jokes. Kinda like when I saw “justices” ginsburg and Breyer in a german scheise video.

    See, that was retarded. Unfortunately, the supreme court has turned into a daily scheise video. That was retarded too.

    Hope that helped.

    Sincerely, Homer J. Simpson.

  13. hellbent Says:

    I get it now, ben! Let me try.

    Maybe they could do a “sneak a peek” search on Kelo’s house while she’s in court, find some Sudafed, declare it a meth lab, and seize the house.

    Is that funny?

  14. Xrlq Says:

    And Homer/Ben misspelled Scheisse, too. That is Sofa King, we Todd did.

  15. SayUncle Says:

    Is that funny?

    Now, you’re getting it 🙂

  16. ben Says:

    funny? No. Retarded? Yes. So ok.

    Also, Scheise, scheisse whatever, in german the ‘s’ or ‘ss’ is actually a different character altogether that looks sorta like a greek ‘beta’. I’m not aware of the english translation of that character being either ‘ss’ or ‘s’ by convention, but it could be either.

  17. Xrlq Says:

    The “beta” symbol to which you refer is called “Eszett” (lit. “sz”) or “scharf-es” (“sharp s”) in German, but AFAIK has no name in English. Given the fact that some call it “Eszett,” I presume that at some point in history, it represented the letters “sz” rather than “ss,” as it does today, but it has never represented the letter “s” alone. The word in question can properly be spelled either “Scheie” or “Scheisse” in German, but definitely not “Scheise,” which would be pronounced “shy-zuh” rather than “shy-suh.” Since one of the two accepted spellings in German requires no special characters, why spell it any other way in English? Unless, of course, the idea is to make the word conform to English phonology, in which case I recommend “shyssuh” instead.

  18. _Jon Says:

    Geeze, I saw 17 comments and thought there was good conversation going on here.
    My bad.
    :tip toes back out:


  19. cube Says:

    “Is that funny?”

    yea, it made me smile. though in that situation the goverment get’s it anyway. in the other jokes, we are trying to screw over the developers.

    Personally, i would have planted kudzoo five years ago.

    “Geeze, I saw 17 comments and thought there was good conversation going on here.”

    same thing happened to me.

  20. FishOrMan Says:

    Now it says 19 comments… but I can’t find any here, (although, I have a strange desire to have some cheese now).

    Salmon… there are plenty of “endangered” salmon. Truckloads upon truckloads. They club them when they make it back to the hatchery, (instead of letting them continue upstream to spawn naturally). Then they take the truckloadS of fish and feed them to the Washington state prison population. They eat “endangered” salmon regulary in prison.

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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