Quick, to your safe space
The sheer pants-shitting hysteria in this piece on what Americans carry in their pocket is amusing. Here’s what I presume is a grown up adult person afraid of inanimate objects.
Via Tam, with completely loses its shit at the sight of a lockback pocket knife of the variety usually given to Texans on their eighth birthday.
September 23rd, 2016 at 6:27 pm
It was my 9th. A Buck in its sheath.
September 23rd, 2016 at 7:02 pm
I love that Americans are paranoid because we want to carry things with which to defend ourselves, but it’s perfectly reasonable that the dude from Norway would blur out the profile of his car keys so that nobody uses the image to make a copy of them, tracks him down in meatspace, and steals his car.
September 23rd, 2016 at 8:36 pm
Two quick stories along those lines:
Once upon a time I was at a retirement party for a government employee in a free state. The retiree, upon being handed a gift inside a cardboard box, asked if anyone had a knife. One of the attendees, a five-foot-nothing, hundred-pound intelligence analyst, reached into her purse and pulled out a lockback folder about the size of a gladius and said, “Here.” She was an ex-Customs inspector and had used it in “devanning” (opening and searching) cargo at the airport. She kept it in her purse, just because.
Many years later, when I was a contractor in DC, someone asked for a knife to open something. Even though I had two lockback folders (of normal size) on me, I said nothing, because I didn’t know what was or wasn’t legal in DC, and I didn’t trust my coworkers. I don’t remember if he ever got it open. Nor do I care.
(I hate the modern world.)
September 23rd, 2016 at 8:52 pm
Sowbelly- Age 8. Sigh…
September 23rd, 2016 at 9:31 pm
They freak that an EMT carries a pocket knife. I used to carry a spring loaded one, because they are easier to open with one hand, and they come in handy for cutting seat belts and such. I also like the comment that employees carrying guns outside of work would be fired.
September 24th, 2016 at 10:23 am
If they get that excited about stuff in people’s pockets, for goodness sake don’t let them look into the emergency stuff I keep in a milk crate in the trunk of my car. Heads would explode.
September 24th, 2016 at 10:49 am
This Brit has apparently not learned her own country’s history. It wasn’t terribly long ago that the well healed English gentleman (or lady) would often be found in possession of a pocket revolver.
She also apparently hasn’t learned what happened as a result of disarming to appease Hitler, or anything about the Lend/Lease program in which regular Americans supplied weapons to regular Brits.
The purpose of the Eloi is to be eaten, and if the Brits insist on behaving like Eloi, they too will be eaten, sooner or later, one way or another.
September 24th, 2016 at 1:55 pm
As is said much too often anymore, this clown is from where Great Britain used to be, sigh…
Oh, and we’re NOT GOING THERE, DAMN IT!
September 25th, 2016 at 1:01 pm
And to think,this is from a nation that once ruled most of the world.”Great Britain” should be viewed as a cautionary tale.
September 25th, 2016 at 8:05 pm
Yes, given the way we pulled their fat from the fire in WW2 – in part by sending them civilian-owned firearms, by the thousands, after they’d disarmed themselves, firearms which they mostly destroyed after the war instead of returning – to make fun of us for this, now that they’ve disarmed themselves AGAIN, is in poor taste at best.
September 26th, 2016 at 2:14 am
Maybe I was a prodigy, but I had a pocket knife before I started elementary school
September 27th, 2016 at 8:56 am
From the comments:
“And what about disarming everyone ? So, you know, everyone will feel more protected”
To paraphrase Tam from a while ago, we already tried a world without guns, it was called the middle ages and it pretty much sucked for everyone.