Today’s idiot: Shalom Auslander
All these gun issues are because you have small dicks.
Yes, all these people are obviously compensating for the size of their penis.
21 Responses to “Today’s idiot: Shalom Auslander”
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August 15th, 2012 at 7:27 pm
That guy sure spends a lot of time fantasizing about gun owners’ dicks.
Just sayin’…
August 15th, 2012 at 7:53 pm
Give the number of things that lefties claim are compensating for penis size, it is not unreasonable to assert that guys with small dicks are responsible for all the technological progress since the Neolithic Revolution.
August 15th, 2012 at 8:19 pm
ahh yes the other half of their version of reasoned discourse. I could make a bingo board out of articles like this.
call them secret racists
dick jokes
accuse them of hating everything
stereotype them
accuse them of stereotyping everyone
say they’re all white
say they’re all male
say they’re all over 40
call them rednecks
on and on and on, I think we could market this thing
August 15th, 2012 at 9:19 pm
Poor little man can’t even open up comments.
I wonder what he’s afraid of?
August 15th, 2012 at 9:23 pm
Pics?
August 15th, 2012 at 9:29 pm
Opening comments would obviously be compensating, which, since he’s presumably so well endowed, he doesn’t need to do. Or something like that.
August 15th, 2012 at 10:04 pm
Hmmm. Gee, I guess if one needs a small penis to own a gun, then EVERY Brady out there must have an arsenal.
August 15th, 2012 at 10:45 pm
Why, oh why, do antis constantly talk about “compensating”? Perhaps they’re *really* engaging in “psychological projection” whereby “a person subconsciously denies his or her own attributes, thoughts, and emotions, which are then ascribed to the outside world, usually to other people.” So perhaps its really the antis who are potentially anti-minority and lesser-endowed?
Think about it!
August 16th, 2012 at 7:08 am
It would appear as though “gun control” extremists spend more time thinking about my genitalia than I do. Which, given I am male, is somewhat impressive.
Or frightening. I am going to go with frightening.
August 16th, 2012 at 9:49 am
I’m with Linoge on this. Makes you wonder if every time they see a guy with a gun they check out his crotch.
August 16th, 2012 at 10:22 am
I suppose some of it could be about penis size. But then you can’t use a penis to defend yourself with.
This fellow has shown that one CAN think with one’s dick and write an article with it firmly grasped in both hands.
August 16th, 2012 at 10:35 am
Montieth sayeth, “This fellow has shown that one CAN think with one’s dick and write an article with it firmly grasped in both hands.”
Obviously, voice dictation software.
August 16th, 2012 at 11:18 am
Sexist.
August 16th, 2012 at 11:23 am
My small dick works just fine, Shalom.
August 16th, 2012 at 11:26 am
“Shalom Auslander” is clearly a pseudonym – I wonder who really wrote that amazing screed? Since they knew enough to disable comments right off the bat, I bet it’s someone we’ve seen before.
August 16th, 2012 at 12:01 pm
*Oh! Oh!* (waving hand) I can haz deconstruction!
In translation “Peace Outsider/Foreigner” is a protective layer (like a rubber!!), a pseudonym for (probably) the Editor – or (often) the Publisher (who is the publication owner). It’s IRONIC!!
The Observer-Icon graphic is shown wearing a hat (Freud!) with his collar turned up and facing sideways – an ObSeRvER not a PARTICIPANT(!)
*(you have to use CAPS when doing this kewl deconstruction stuff)*
He Representing/Defining an Outsider viewpoint (the essence of hipster cool is not-belonging, unb-chaioned, un-restrainred vision)
And by definition, Hipster is Ironic and Cool – and always misunderstood – which is the Ironic Paradox, because to always be right and correct is to be misunderstood by all the Squares and the Un-Hip who don’t “get it.”
In other words (and shorter) it’s word salad without a lot of dressing or even lettuce, but evidently some little dick…
August 16th, 2012 at 12:21 pm
Oh and…
Looking to a New York Magazine on rational arguments about gun control is like going to The Westboro Baptist Church to ask about birth control.
August 16th, 2012 at 1:57 pm
He should just come out of the closet and be done with it.
August 16th, 2012 at 6:39 pm
This guy thinks about cock more than a 25 cent hooker on a busy day. Glad to know I’m not the only one looking out for mine. It’s so small I need an extra set of liber…. I mean eyes to keep track. I figure since it’s so small I may as well have the guns too.
Then again, I also notice this Intellisaurus has a problem with someone having a sticker with a positive reference to Jesus. If you’re willing to try and take away my faith, you are certainly willing to try and take away my guns. Given that logic… You can take everything away after you’ve successfully taken away my guns which, by the way, will never happen unless you pull it out of your cold puckered ass. Given your leanings toward cock… You should be glad you perceive mine as small because if you try to take ANYTHING away from me… you’re screwed. I’ll screw you so long you’ll think it’s a carreer!!!
That is all,
Disavowed With Honor
August 17th, 2012 at 9:11 am
No, Shalom Auslander is his real name. Google it, idiot. The 2nd Amendment needs smarter defenders than we have on this comments board.
August 17th, 2012 at 11:33 pm
Gee, thanks for being so civil, Sholomo. Did a quick search – that dude has some serious issues going on inside his head..