Yet the person stuck in the parking lot is there through his own choice. It’s all about personal responsibility. No one made him go into that parking lot. He chose to go there, and his penance is to sit there till traffic clears.

By allowing someone into traffic, you create an offense against the rest of humanity. I will pray for you.

Now all of you think I’m nuts. I would think it of you, if you told me that. Doesn’t change it, though.

Depending on how evil I feel, I might segue into discussions about tv, sports, traffic or whatever strikes my fancy. I once talked about ghosts I had met. I lied.

It helped that Dad was rather large. He’d exit his GMC Carryall about like an average person would exit a VW Beetle. The sight somehow took the fight out of most men.

Of course, I do the obligatory hands-in-the-air sign of frustration at my unfortunate circumstance and maybe even one of the mouthed “sorry” motions to the person that is so unlucky to have found themselves behind me during my predicament.

Then, just as it gets to the last possible instant before the light turns red, I somehow manage to get the car started and make it through the light. Then the poor guy behind me ends up having to wait through another whole stoplight cycle before they can go. Awww. How sad.

One side benefit to this is that it puts some distance between you after you tick them off.

Not that I recommend anyone else do this…..

They expect fuck off, so when you lay that other one on them, it pisses them off even more.

Yeah, I usually blow kisses. Boy, that pisses people off.