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Ornery Geese

Six biologists and technicians with the U.S. Department of Agriculture’s Wildlife Services Division spent the morning herding gaggles of geese into pens at Greenbelt Bicentennial Park for relocation to areas adjacent to Kentucky Lake in West Tennessee.

Me and the Mrs. were there last weekend and there were literally hundreds of geese and ducks. Geese are fairly unpleasant animals. Every year (twice per year), there is a group of 3 – 4 geese that settle in my subdivision for a couple of weeks to take a break from migrating.

Geese are not very smart. I have a seventy pound bull dog. You would think that when such a dog was near the geese that the geese would lay low and keep it quiet (like rabbits) so as not to draw the dog’s attention. This is not the case. I would take pupster for a walk and the geese would come out, start strutting around with their wings extended, and honking. They were trying to intimidate me and my pooch so that we would leave their property. Don’t they realize I pay a mortgage and it’s my property? They were safe because pupster was on a leash. This went on for about four days. One day, I’d had enough of these uppity geese. I looked around and none of my neighbors were out and I knew pupster wouldn’t catch them (the can fly, you know, or so I thought). So, I unhooked pupster’s leash and off he went in full geese catching mode.

Pupster chased the geese for a good hundred yards. Did I mention that geese aren’t real smart? The geese flew away from pupster while staying relatively close to the ground (maybe three or so feet). Apparently, they forget that they can fly upwards when they are stressed. As pupster was closing in on the flying geese, they finally remembered Oh yeah, flying is three dimensional. We can go up! Pupster didn’t catch them, which is good because I’d hate to violate some arbitrary federal migratory bird law. Yet, those geese (who did return two days later) weren’t so vocal the next time we went for a walk. Lesson learned.

Instead of USDA agents, maybe the feds should just ask to borrow pupster.

4 Responses to “Ornery Geese”

  1. SK Bubba Says:

    We’ve got a gaggle that seems to have taken up almost permanent residence. They roam around in unruly packs of 20 or 30. Plus there were 15 babies this year.

    Last year I made the mistake of feeding one pair and their babies some corn in the back yard. What a mess.

    Mrs. Bubba said no more of that. So when they came back around looking for a handout I turned pupster loose and she chased them up and down the fairway until they got smart and landed in the pond, where they mocked her as she stood on the bank barking at them. After a couple of these roustings they decided to steer clear of our place.

    One tried to fight back and attacked pupster with the hissing and wing flapping one time. It scared the hell out of her and SHE ran away. Fortunately they others haven’t caught on that she’s a big sissy.

  2. SayUncle Says:

    You should borrow pupster. He’d go in the water after them. He tried that at the greenbelt but his retractable leash only gave him about 20 ft of play. I could start my own geese removal business.

  3. MommaBear Says:

    Golf courses and public parks are now using Scottish Sheep Dogs, patrolling the grounds about every 2 days, to great effect. Since they are bred to herd, not catch, they are not looking at the geese as prey, but “things to be herded”.

  4. The Daily Rant Says:

    Getting in touch with my Inner Social Conservative
    I have much sympathy for SayUncle, who blogs about squatter geese who not only take over the property he pays

Remember, I do this to entertain me, not you.

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